the better to stalk you with, my dear

i gotta feeling....

2009-10-13T11:19:00.001-07:00

i've been "in like" with this song over the past week or so.

but, after watching this video, produced by a group of students at the university of quebec, i have fallen in LOVE.

mazel tov!

a funny thing happened on the way to slc.....

2009-09-30T10:48:00.000-07:00

spotted through my car window, during my recent trip......

game, set, MATCH

2009-08-27T09:34:00.000-07:00

my co-worker, margie, and i have been working together for just under five years now.

during that time we have occasionally shown up to work wearing "coordinating outfits".

but, that usually meant we would both be wearing similar rebel-red, university logo t-shirts on a casual friday.

however, over the past month, we have taken our coordination to a whole new level.

if i show up in a grass green dress and white undershirt, she shows up in a grass green t-shirt and white pants.

if she shows up in a purple top and black pants, i show up in a black top and purple pants.

if i show up in sky blue capris with a chocolate stripe, she shows up in chocolate capris with a sky blue stripe.

we are matchy matchy.

and, it's been happening A LOT.

so, to avoid the accusations that we are trying to dress alike, margie, i just want to let you know that i plan on wearing my denim three piece suit next tuesday.

and my (fun!) print romper on thursday.

and my thong on casual friday.

please plan your wardrobe accordingly.

nine lives

2009-07-31T11:31:00.000-07:00

i hope that adoptive parents of kittens get nine lives.

because i have expended at least three lives in the past week and a half.

death by stress and worry.

one of my new kittens, oliver, ended up getting very sick a few days after i returned from NYC.

i came home from work one evening to find him very lethargic, unresponsive to paisley's prompts to play and slightly cold to the touch.

after numerous trips to the vet, an x-ray, blood work, temperature readings, sleepless nights, a couple "vacation days" from work and a pretty penny or two, we didn't really have any answers.

so, i just kept praying for a miracle.

and i'm happy to report that oliver is finally back to his healthy, fun loving, sister chasing, butterfly pouncing, mommy snuggling, fly catching self.

THANK GOD. for reals.

now oliver can resume behaving just like this:

and i wouldn't ask for it to be any other way.

peewee's big adventure

2009-07-21T10:24:00.000-07:00

when heading to the big apple, might i suggest skipping the sex in the city tour.

because peewee's big adventure is where it's at!

follow in the footsteps of ~~Carrie & Co.~~ peewee as you conquer NYC! drink where peewee drinks, shop where peewee shops, and gossip where peewee gossips.

let me tell you, people, this tour does not disappoint.

your guide will provide you with a uniquely enjoyable experience that will expand your awareness of the extraordinary ~~history~~ FOOD, activities, restaurants, SHOE shopping areas, neighborhoods and resources in new york city!

you'll start off your fun-filled days at jack's, where you will get to experience the stroller crowd first hand. (kiefer sutherland sightings are not guaranteed).

lest you fear that you won't have any "celebrity experiences", let me assure you that you will be dining with zac efron on a regular basis.

and, let's not forget about mick and maggie. they are truly celebrities in their own right.

peewee also has her own stanford blatch, who may or may not buy you a really ~~crappy~~ expensive italian dinner and tickets to a broadway show! and, since he's gay (not that there's anything wrong with that), you won't even have to "put out".

i recommend you show up hungry for this tour. generally, this is not your basic ‘weight watchers’ recommended tour, although you will find food for every diet imaginable (like the meat eating vegetarian's diet).

eating "experiences" will include peanut butter kit kats, crumbs cupcakes, max's lasagna, five napkin burgers, s'mac's mac n cheese, nyc pizza, magnolia bakery's cupcakes with banana pudding and french pastries. to name a few.

now, if you feel the need to work off some of those calories, you have the option to take a fast paced stroll around the newly renovated washington square park, attend a power yoga class or park yourself on the couch and watch endless hours of cash cab. (pick the cash cab option. you'll thank me later).

so, pack your bags and book your tours! space and time is limited.

32 is the new 23

2009-07-13T15:39:00.000-07:00

i highly recommend ringing in your 32nd year with a hearty breakfast of fruit loops, all while donning mouse ears and pig tails. (because you're only as old as you act!)

then, pick up a disney-loving girl friend and head to the happiest place on earth.

where you should play a rousing game of pants or no pants*.

*pants or no pants is a great addition to the traditional sport of people watching. simply identify a ~~target~~ contestant and determine if they are wearing pants or no pants. a great adaptation of this game is bra or no bra.

pants. just barely.

no pants

surprisingly, pants.

questionable. khaki underpants, in my opinion.

urmmmm.....

no comment.

inconspicuously taking photos of random stranger's bottoms is totally appropriate, right?

follow up your disney day by boogie boarding at the beach with a sea lion. (sadly, i was not able to catch a picture of said sea lion. because i was IN THE OCEAN. duh.)

and, finally, finish the festivities by thanking everyone who sent you birthday wishes and made your weekend extraordinary. THANK YOU!

it's my party, and i'll cry if i want to

2009-07-10T10:00:00.000-07:00

by the time you read this post, i'll be here

wearing this

kicking her butt

on this ride

and gorging myself on these

because it's my birthday!

and i am awesome. (that part was just for you, kristina)

photographer to the stars

2009-07-09T08:16:00.000-07:00

and by stars, i mean me (of course).

my friend (and personal photographer), vanessa zinke, will be in SLC august 25 - september 1.

if you, or someone you know, is looking for a photographer to shoot your family portraits, please give her a call.

i mean, c'mon, if she can make me look good, she can make anyone look good.

check out the details of her trip, and her work here.

the world's shortest fairytale

2009-07-07T13:44:00.000-07:00

Once upon a time, a guy asked a girl "Will you marry me?" The girl said:"NO!"

And the girl lived happily ever-after and went shopping, dancing, camping, drank ~~martinis~~ virgin margaritas, (almost) always had a clean house, never had to cook, did whatever the hell she wanted, never argued, ~~didn't get fat~~ was fat and happy, traveled more, ~~had many lovers~~ was not a ho, didn't (have to) save money, and had all the hot water to herself. She went to the theater, never watched sports, never wore friggin' lacy lingerie that went up her ~~ass~~ buns, had high self esteem, never cried or yelled, felt and looked fabulous in sweat pants and was pleasant all the time.
The End

here kitty, kitty

2009-06-29T08:03:00.000-07:00

i am in love.

how could i not be?!?

good idea, bad idea

2009-06-24T07:36:00.000-07:00

good idea: persuade someone you really get along with to propose to you.
bad idea: persuade a female someone you really get along with to propose to you. (when neither of you are gay. not that there's anything wrong with that.)

*the ring(s) are made of candy. score!

good idea: invite yourself to dinner with your daughter and her friend (possible new fiance).
bad idea: invite yourself to dinner with your daughter and her friend, when they have to leave early and you get stuck alone at the table, with the bill.

*free dinner for me and heidi. score!

good idea: tell the lovely and talented sara that you're coming to see her star in the hit play, the wizard of oz.
bad idea: tell the lovely and talented sara that you're coming to see her star in the hit play, the wizard of oz, a full week before actually going to see her. Therefore, allowing her to forget you're coming and not feel the need to make an appearance after the show to greet her adoring fans and collect her flowers.

*these lovely flowers are now adorning my desk at work. score!

heidi,
thank you for the ring(s). but i have to say, although i love you, there are people in other places that i love more*. ;)

*most quotable line from last night's show. score!

antidepressant

2009-06-18T08:00:00.000-07:00

makes me laugh everytime!

mad lib

2009-06-15T21:43:00.000-07:00

i thought we might all like to brush up on our parts of speech before proceeding with this post.......

ad-jec-tive

an adjective modifies a noun or a pronoun by describing, identifying, or quantifying words.

ad-verb

an adverb is a word which usually describes a verb. It tells you how something is done. It may also tell you when or where something happened.

noun

a noun is a word used to name a person, animal, place, thing, and abstract idea.

verb

a verb is a word which describes an action (doing something) or a state (being something).

ok, if i haven't scared you off with all that learnin', let's get onto the story.

a letter from the road
-a mad lib by rychelle-
(extremely funny, if read with an accent)

travelogue, day 1

today we toured the insert adjective oquirrh mountain temple. i don't think i've ever seen a more insert adjective chandelier in all my life. good work, mormon craftsmen. i left with a feeling of peace, despite the insert number blister(s) formed on the bottom of my insert body part. (but, boy, did i look hot in those 3 inch heels. i'm kinda' surprised i didn't meet my future husband on that tour. i feel slightly insert adjective/still inspired and holy-like.)

following the temple tour, we headed out to kurt and amanda's insert adjective wedding. the bride looked insert adjective as she insert verb down the soggy isle. it's a shame we couldn't hear any of the ceremony, due to the fact that we were seated right next to the insert adjective ducks. but, it was entertaining to watch the insert adjective guests consume mass amounts of insert liquid and then try to navigate the un-even and insert adjective terrain. (note to self: doughnut holes + wedding cake = two things i truly love, but it's kind of like crossing a penguin with an owl. it sounds like a good idea, until you end up with a pengowl.)

travelogue, day 2

today i met up with insert noun (person) and insert noun (person) at insert noun (place) for scones. (note to self: find out why they do not have a "scone place" in las vegas.)

travelogue, day 3

today i began a two day day road trip with a two year old. insert adjective idea!

my favorite person and i began our adventure by having lunch with the insert adjective and insert adjective camille. she is even more insert adjective in person, than she is on her blog. i seriously contemplated purchasing her sister's house, just so we could be closer to one another, enabling me to insert verb her in person on a regular basis.

after lunch, we continued on to grandma and grandpa taylor's place where we insert verb cookies, played kick ball, watched tractor shows (who knew there were entire programs dedicated to tractors?!?) and petted the insert plural noun, insert plural noun and insert plural noun.

travelogue, day 4

after insert verb (ending in ing) our breakfast of pancakes and eggs, my favorite person and i hit the road once more. this time we headed towards the insert adjective city of idaho falls, to visit our insert adjective uncle, hott blair. we enjoyed our time there by graffiting the pavement with sidewalk chalk, playing with "that kid" and giving long, contemplative and curious stares to brant. (he really is a insert adjective looking fellow.)

travelogue, day 5

home again, home again, jiggety jig......today we insert adverb headed back to slc. the highlights of today's journey were driving through the insert severe weather condition, hitting insert adjective bumps in the road and peeing outside! (note to self: get yourself one of those two year olds. they make road trips, and life in general, a lot more insert adjective.)

travelogue, day 6

let me just say that joel mchale is freakin' insert adjective! i don't think i've insert verb that much all year. (note to self: don't bother visiting your father's birthplace, magna ut. although it sounds like a hilarious adventure, i'm sure the reality of the place would be depressing.)

travelogue, day 7

today i joined a group of insert adjective bloggers for lunch. it turned out to be a insert adjective experience. although many of my favorite bloggers were absent, i got to insert verb all kinds of new ones.

"the girls" (i want to clarify that by "the girls" i am referring to the women in my family, not my breasts. although, my breasts were also present) and i ended the evening by going to see the proposal, at the insert noun (place). although we were insert number minutes late, i don't think we missed much. the show was both funny and insert adjective. (note to theatre: if you're going to make me sit in an assigned seat, it would be nice if you provided me a way to find said seat in the dark.)

travelogue, day 8

today is a insert adjective day. it's time to leave slc and head back to insert noun (place). but, on a positive note, i got to make the insert number hour drive with heidi! we played MAD LIBS on the way home, which made the trip seem like only insert number hours long. there's nothing like laughing your insert body part off, while driving insert number miles per hour. believe you me, we will be insert verb about this trip for years to come!

on the road again

2009-06-05T16:00:00.000-07:00

on the road again.....

boy do i love that song!

it was kinda' my family's theme song as i was growing up.

we moved A LOT.

we were on the road a lot.

as you are reading this post, i am on the road again.

i'll be traveling the roads of UT and ID for the next week or so.

visiting my favorite person, and some other folks i may or may not be related to.

i can't wait to see everyone!

and, if you're attending queen kristina's bloggy luncheon, i may even see you. (i sure hope i do.)

.......i can't wait to get on the road again.

strangers in the night

2009-06-04T09:22:00.000-07:00

although i haven't been posting much lately, i have not been neglecting blogger all together.

i have been reading a lot of blogs.

blog hopping.

blog stalking.

prior to this, i realized i had become accustom to strictly reading those blogs i subscribed to in reader and that i was neglecting my former (all encompassing) hobby of blog stalking.

i hadn't been living outside my box.

i had forgotten how much fun it was to explore the blogosphere.

find new blogs.

new content.

new inspiration.

during my recent stalks, i've stumbled across a few blogs that have provided me with a renewed sense of hope.

hope that i hadn't even really realized i had been lacking.

these blogs serve as a reminder of why i fell in love with blogging in the first place.

blogs are a place to make connections and find inspiration.

connections with friends, family and sometimes even strangers.

i want to put a "thank you" out there to all those blogs that have given me a sense of hope and a glimpse of fortitude over the past few weeks.*

*because i feel that the content of these blogs may not touch you in the same way they have touched me, i'm not going to post any links. but, i encourage you to do a little blog hoping, and find some new inspiration of your own.

i have a renewed passion for blog stalking! (hopefully that translates into a renewed passion for posting, too.)

get me out of here

2009-06-01T07:49:00.001-07:00

i feel NBC is using the term celebrity a little too liberally.

sa-weet(ie)

2009-05-26T10:04:00.000-07:00

image courstesy of google images

the clerk at my local grocery store called me sweetie.

it kinda' made my whole day.

so, i'd like to tell YOU to "have a great day, sweetie."

see, don't you feel like having a great day now, sweetie?

i sure hope you do.

sweetie.

it's not you, it's me

2009-05-21T09:42:00.000-07:00

i honestly don't know what's been going on with me lately.

i seem to have lost my passion for blogging.

i've lost my inspiration, my zest, my fervor, my spice, my hankering, my desire.

i've got a serious case of the bloggy funk.

do you think there's a prescription for that?

it's not even that i've had a lack of "activity" in my life.

for instance, i recently enjoyed a wonderful weekend in boise.

i went there to celebrate a very important birthday (they are all important, in my book) of my very good friend, karen.

we ate and chatted and stayed up late and ate and shopped for six hours straight and met up with some old friends and new friends and dogs and ate and slept in and ate and shopped.

it was just what the doctor ordered (but not the cure for the bloggy funk).

btw, karen doesn't look a day over 25.

but, i can't prove that to you because we didn't take one single photo the whole time i was there.

do you think vacations really count, if there is no photographic evidence?

in addition to being an out-of-town visitor, i had out-of-town visitors.

i love out-of-town visitors.

just not enough to take their picture and put it into a blog post.

sorry. (but i DO love you).

i also hosted a "craft day" one weekend.

it was a wonderful day spent with two of my favorite people.

one a new favorite. one an old favorite.

we ate (do you sense a pattern?) and shopped and sewed and laughed and crashed a wedding.

so, as you can see, i've been up to something.

just not blogging.

can someone write me a prescription for the bloggy funk?!?

it's too hot to blog

2009-05-07T08:07:00.001-07:00

discombobulated

2009-04-23T13:09:00.000-07:00

do you ever have those periods in your life where nothing seems to make sense?!?

one day you wake up and it's snowing, and then seven days later it's 96 degrees outside.

you seem to have gained twenty pounds overnight, and your "fat jeans" have become your "skinny jeans".

your co-worker utters the phrase "did you know there is a chia obama head?"

you try to open your eyelids one morning, only to discover they're glued shut because you've suddenly developed killer allergies after 30 years of an allergy free life.

you have a conversation with a work associate that goes something along the lines of "l as in lion, f as in frog and g as in what ever starts with the letter g." and you are the one WHO CAN'T THINK OF A SINGLE WORD IN THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE THAT STARTS WITH THE LETTER G.

you suddenly have an overwhelming urge to celebrate bacon night, even though you've never enjoyed the taste of bacon.

(hell yes it is!)
photo courtesy of photobasement.com

*i'll be taking a little bloggy break, until i can get this all sorted out.

the following news is sader than the final episode of the girls next door

2009-04-16T09:29:00.000-07:00

dear bloggy peeps,

unfortunately, due to family obligations, i won't be able to host a bloggy lunch this weekend after all.

boo.

despite the fact that jett blue is determined to keep us apart, i assure you i will be back in slc in the near future.

i sincerely hope we can all meet up at that time.

until then, i leave you with this photograph of me and hugh hefner.

feel free to place it on your lunch table saturday afternoon. (you know, if you haven't just lost your appetite).

missing you already,
rychelle

april fools

2009-04-15T08:07:00.000-07:00

dear mother nature,

wtf?!?

SNOW?

are you freakin' kidding me?

it is april.

and this is las vegas.

IT IS APRIL.

AND THIS IS LAS VEGAS.

your un-amused prank victim,

rychelle

egg-cellent weekend

2009-04-13T13:08:00.000-07:00

my mom, margie (best co-worker in the world) and i decided to take a much needed, last minute trip to st. george and cedar city this weekend.

we hit the road on friday night, and made it to the tuacahn theatre just in time for a jim brickman concert.

we enjoyed an evening of great music and beautiful spring weather, perfect for this picturesque outdoor venue.

on saturday, we slept in (my favorite thing to do), went to a quilt show and then headed to iceberg for a "mini" shake and fries with fry sauce.

did you know fry sauce is not even sold outside the state of utah?

or, maybe, outside the states of utah and idaho.

either way, you can't get it in nevada.

margie had never even HEARD of it before.

we took her fry sauce virginity.

then, we headed home saturday afternoon so we could spend easter with our families.

it was a great weekend, with two GREAT ladies.

can't wait 'til the next spontaneous road trip, gals. ;)

better off

2009-04-09T10:21:00.000-07:00

a couple of weeks ago, amy posted about a new sit-com she and her husband had stumbled across while watching abc.

i watched the clip she posted and thought to myself "hey, that looks like it would be worth checking out".

but, i never got around to it.

however, when my super awesome co-worker started talking about the same show, and how much she enjoyed it, i knew it was time to fully check it out.

so, i may or may not have watched the first three episodes of better off ted in my office yesterday.

whilst WORKING very hard, of course.

and, I LOVED IT!

it's funny and clever and FUNNY.

it stars portia de rossi, who also stared in arrested development.

so, this show is already awesome due to the laws of physics and the six degrees of separation.......or something like that.

all i'm saying is, i've finally found a sit-com that i enjoy. (one that isn't only available on dvd or in re-runs).

so, i recommend you check out better off ted..........wednesday nights........abc.

or not.

you know, whatever.

but, seriously, DO.

i'm blue (jet blue)

2009-04-07T07:34:00.000-07:00

dear jet blue airlines,

i'm not sure what happened between us.

i thought we had a good thing going.

you agreed to fly me to the city where my favorite person on earth lives for a reasonable price, and i agreed to promote your low fares and free television to all those who would listen.

i BRAGGED about your exceptional service, unlimited free snacks and convenient departure times.

and how do you repay me?

by canceling your lv to slc route.*

nice.

i must admit that this breakup was just as sudden and even more painful than the one that ended via an email with the subject line: "conscription and the relative universal imperatives". (true story. i was once broken up with via an EMAIL entitled conscription and the relative universal imperatives. thanks for dragging up those memories, jet blue. kick me while i'm down, why don't cha?)

i don't know how i will go on, but i'm sure it will involve that skank, southwest airlines.

do you see what you're driving me to?!?

i hope you're happy.

broken hearted and betrayed,

rychelle

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

dear bloggy peeps,

i will be in slc on saturday, april 18.
(one last trip before jet blue ~~rips out my heart~~ cancels their route)

if you're interested in joining me at a bloggy lunch, i plan on being at cafe rio (1664 w town center drive, south jordan, ut 84095) at high noon.

if you think you can make it, please let me know. (i need to know how many tables i should "claim" by laying across them until you arrive.)

i REALLY hope you all can make it!

but, if not, i guess that just leaves more delicious house dressing for me.

*you can still fly from lv to slc via longbeach. it will take you 7 hours to do so. and, that's not including the two hours (or eight minutes) you have to spend at the airport being molested by the TSA. i can DRIVE to slc in 6 hours, so i think i'll pass on that flight.

a very merry un-birthday to you

2009-04-03T10:30:00.000-07:00

my good friend, heidi, is a christmas baby.

every year her birthday is ~~overshadowed by~~ celebrated along with the birth of Jesus and jimmy buffett.

in other words, every year heidi gets jipped.

she did receive two separate gifts from me in december, but was quick to point out that i did not publish a blog post dedicated to HER special day.

so, i am making it up to her here.

today we will celebrate the day heidi was (probably) conceived!

the day her parents performed a "special hug", and created my special friend. (has the image of that statement been seared into your mind, heidi?!?)

and to express my gratitude to heidi's parents for planning (or not) to bring her into the world *mumbled whisper, cough, cough - a good number of* years ago, i will now list the reasons why i am glad she is here. . . .

1. heidi has excellent taste in music. we like to rock out to all the same bands. and, she is a fantabulous concert buddy.

2. heidi loves lunch almost as much as i do. and, dinner and breakfast too.

3. heidi is a bigger disneyland freak than anyone i know.

4. heidi is a first-class story teller.

5. heidi is funny. hilarious, even.

6. heidi is not above molesting wax mannequins of my man crush, matthew mcconaughey.

7. heidi always remembers to send me a postcard. or at least bring one to me, if she forgets her postcard stamps.

8. heidi knows exactly what i mean when i say "skelo-satan".

9. heidi makes delicious peanut butter balls. and she shares.

10. heidi appreciates a good craft day.

heidi is awesome, and i'm glad we are friends.

happy this-is-the-day-you-were-most-likely-conceived day, heidi! (give or take a week, depending on your mother's "cycle")

heaven scent

2009-04-02T12:56:00.001-07:00

they just mowed the grass outside my office.

i'm pretty sure this is what heaven will smell like.

( i wish we had smell-o-puters, so i could link the actual scent here)

ah-choo

2009-03-31T12:27:00.000-07:00

bnl, allergies

i have allergies.

i haven't always had allergies.

how does someone "develop" allergies?!?

aside from the sneezing and watery eyes, my allergies choose to present themselves in the form of a lovely rash all over my arms and legs. (yay. just in time for the season of short sleeves).

i went to the doctor, and i have a prescription for an anti-itch cream and an anti-itch pill.

the cream was supposed to take away the rash within two weeks.

it hasn't.

the pills are supposed to help me resist the urge to scratch off twelve layers of my own skin.

mostly, they just make me tired.

do you have allergies?

do you know any home remedies?

can any of you have the wind turned off in las vegas?

anyone?

this land is your land, this land is my land

2009-03-26T07:44:00.001-07:00

will someone please tell me what has happened to tv land?!?

gone are the days of using this television station to escape to a simpler time.

the days of finding june cleaver fixin' dinner for the beaver.

the days of catching ethel and lucy attempting their next ridiculous adventure.

the days of whistling along with the title scenes of the andy griffith show.

apparently, these are the days of outing your best friend as a prostitute at your class reunion.

the days of dating (ie. sleeping with) men young enough to be the fruits of your loins.

i tuned into the tv land network last night, expecting to find i love lucy (one of my all time favorite shows) or, at the very least, a re-run of m*a*s*h.

instead, i was forced (yes, forced. it was like a train wreck, i COULDN'T turn away) to be a witness to some of the worst television i've seen in.......well, days, probably (unfortunately. there is a lot of bad tv out there these days).

the show that was airing is called high school reunion.

what i like to call it is an excuse for 40 year olds to act, dress and behave like 14 year olds.

really stupid, low class, ridiculous, drunk, 14 year olds.

but, the true gem of the new tv land line up seems to be the show they can't stop advertising, the cougar.

it is described as:

"From the creator of The Bachelor comes a game-changing, provocative new reality show that redefines the rules of dating. One sexy, single, sophisticated woman is set up with younger men who are all vying for her affection. Through a series of weekly challenges, the men must prove they have what it takes to satisfy a woman of a certain age and avoid the kiss of death: a kiss on the cheek. Watch as The Cougar narrows her choices from 20 to 10 to five, ultimately choosing one lucky man to be her soul mate."

i'm pretty sure "sophisticated" and "soul mate" don't mean what the show's producers think they mean.

but, my favorite phrase might be "the kiss of DEATH: a kiss on the cheek".

it clarifies a lot of the scenes they are touting in their commercials.

the ones where she appears to be having "relations" with a handful of the men.

clearly, she was just trying to save them from DEATH.

two is not so terrible

2009-03-24T10:00:00.000-07:00

my favorite person has just turned two!

and, i was fortunate enough to score an invite to his exclusive birthday bash.

let me just say, jordan hosted a rockin' celebration, the likes of which salt lake has not seen since the twilight premier party.

aside from being another excuse to consume excessive amounts of costco cake, this weekend also proved to be a learning experience.

here are just a few "facts of life" i picked up on this weekend:

two years passes by REALLY FAST.

two year olds enjoy the sound of balloons popping a lot more than i do.

you may not be able to get a two year old to speak your name on command (it is the CUTEST thing i've ever heard), but if you tell the wii to stop calling you a "fat ass", he will repeat that.

one hour of wagon rides in not enough. you will be asked for MORE.

eric carle books are more exciting to a two year old than paul frank underwear. but, it's the opposite for adults.

you don't need a fork to eat cake.

it can snow in utah in the spring.

and finally, it is possible to make it from the jett blue ticket counter onto your airplane in exactly 8 minutes, at the salt lake city airport. (that would NEVER happen at the las vegas airport!)

HAPPY BIRTHDAY JORDAN!

just remember, I love you the most.

girls just want to have fun

2009-03-17T08:34:00.000-07:00

BEST.WEEKEND.EVER!

martha (bff since 7th grade), sarah and i just returned home from the ultimate girl's only weekend.

we hit the road, and headed to universal studios for a weekend filled with laughter, a dash of terrifying horror, mass amounts of hilarity, BIRTHDAY CELEBRATIONS, a pinch of debauchery and stalking (of course).

we were even fortunate enough to spend sunday afternoon with l.a.'s most snarkatsic tour guide, kristin.

she introduced us to the farmer's market and THE GROVE!

although i didn't take any pictures while we were with kristin (duh), this photo says it all:

we got MATCHING iphone covers!

now, THAT'S how you tell a stalkee that you really love them (and their sense of style).

and, lest you worry about our non-church-attending-because-we-were-vacationing-on-a-sunday souls, rest assured.

we read the ten commandments, as seen on billboards from the freeway, on our way home.

it's totally the same thing as attending three hours of services, right?

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MARTHA!

i love you both like sisters!

southern hospitality

2009-03-13T08:03:00.000-07:00

as you all know, i love to take stalking to the next level.

so, when i found out kristen was coming to vegas to run a marathon, i just knew we had to get together.

and, i am so glad we did!

she, and her husband ("mr. c") are absolutely CHARMING.

we met up last night for dinner.

we sat on the "porch" at lucille's bbq.

we enjoyed the spring weather, and one another's company.

we talked about travel, running, quilting and blogging (of course).

she and mr. c have the cutest accents.

i really want to visit north carolina now!

kristen, maybe we'll have to "do dinner" again in the fall?

next time, it's ON ME! in your home town. :)

the song remembers when

2009-03-11T09:30:00.000-07:00

i heard this song on the radio yesterday.

and in an instant i was transported back to my freshman year in high school.

it was lunch hour.

i was sitting on the grass in the "quad" at silver valley high school.

i was eating a chicken sandwich.

there was a warm breeze blowing through my hair.

the sun was warm on my skin.

i was laughing at martha and "sausage biscuits".

i was 14 and life was simple and complicated all at the same time.

isn't it amazing how a song can take you back to a place and time you thought you had forgotten?

is there a song that does that for you?

i'm gonna trade this life for fortune and fame. i'd even cut my hair and change my name.

2009-03-09T09:08:00.000-07:00

who knew becoming a rockstar was going to be so easy?

amber tagged me (to create an ablum cover for my fledgling rock band) on facebook, but i thought i'd post my debut album here instead.

anyone who's actually heard me sing, will be happy to know this album cover is as far as my rock career has gone.

i tag anyone who is suppressing an inner rockstar!

and who can follow these rules:

YOUR ALBUM ARTWORK:

1 - Go to "wikipedia." Hit “random”or click http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Special:RandomThe first random wikipedia article you get is the name of your band.

2 - Go to "Random quotations"or click http://www.quotationspage.com/random.php3The last four or five words of the very last quote of the page is the title of your first album.

3 - Go to flickr and click on “explore the last seven days”or click http://www.flickr.com/explore/interesting/7daysThird picture, no matter what it is, will be your album cover.

4 - Use photoshop or similar to put it all together.

this one was lots of fun! (thanks amber).

sense and sensibility

2009-03-06T07:46:00.000-08:00

i was tagged by arianne at little pink houses. (thanks arianne!)

so, here it goes.......

5 Senses Tag

List 4 things you love, and one thing you hate, for each category.

Smell:
1. fresh cut grass. i’m actually allergic to grass. i can’t roll around in it, but i sure can appreciate the way it smells!
2. baking bread.
3. rain.
4. coffee grinds or coffee brewing. i’ve never had a cup of coffee. ever. but the smell of coffee reminds me of my grandpa.
5. Hate: ammonia. how can something that smells so awful clean anything?

Touch:
1. minkie. have you ever felt this fabric?!? i think i should use it to make my own snuggie.
2. vincent vega. my best friend’s cat. he has the softest fur EVER. i think he has a celebrity stylist.
3. sand. i love going to the beach. walking in the sand. building sand castles. letting the sand run through my fingers. when I worked in daycare, i was always in the sandbox with the kids.
4. when someone you love reaches for your hand. whether it is a boyfriend, mother or friend. that small gesture is very reassuring to me.
5. Hate: anything sticky. if someone poured a cooler of Gatorade over my head, I could very well spontaneously combust.

Sound:
1. laughter. in all forms.
2. the ocean.
3. windshield wipers. thump-swish. thump-swish. it reminds me of all the road trips we took when I was a kid.
4. acoustic guitar.
5. Hate: my mother’s sneezes. they are SO LOUD. i nearly jump out of my skin every time she sneezes. (but i still love YOU, mom).

Taste:
1. good quality milk chocolate.
2. homemade tacos.
3. restaurant ranch dressing. why does it always taste better in a restaurant?
4. did i already mention chocolate?!? yeah? how about chocolate milk shakes?
5. Hate: tomatoes.

Sight:
1. fresh flowers. planted, potted or in a vase.
2. big puffy clouds in a clear blue sky.
3. dimples.
4. beautiful photography. i appreciate when someone has an eye for capturing moments on film. nature and/or portrait.
5. Hate: cold sores. i have a giant outbreak on the TOP of my NOSE right now. seriously? who gets a cold sore there? i look like rudolph. rudolph with an STD.

i tag anyone who has been struggling to get a post out right now, like me.

have a great weekend everyone!

daredevil? yep, that's me.

2009-03-03T10:16:00.000-08:00

x-ray technician - have you ever broken a bone before?

me - yes. i broke my collarbone a LONG time ago.

x-ray technician - so, are you some kind of daredevil?

me - no. just a klutz.

****************************

dr. - did you hear any popping or snapping when you landed?

me - i couldn't hear anything above the laughter.

***************************

well, my ski-adventure-i-hope-i-don't-break-a-limb-weekend with hott blair and his family was semi-successful.

i didn't BREAK a limb, i just SPRAINED one.

i can only assume it happened ~~that one time~~ during one of those six or so times i went tumbling down the mountain.

and, since the ski resort refuses to release their secret footage (i know they're recording the runs, for the sheer joy of catching klutzy skiers tumbling down the mountain) i offer you these photographs and drawings.

(if only i had seen that sign BEFORE i attempted to ski that run.)

(that little squirrel was no help at all.)

(he was laughing with me, right?!?)

(i get to wear this sexy brace thingy for two whole weeks. i think it's time to break out the skirts, because i'm gonna want to show that thing off!)

now, despite the minor injury, i did have a great time!

the weather was PERFECT, the company was PERFECT, and i needed a good laugh anyway.

hott blair, ron and crew, i love you more than words can say.

but, i am wondering what a guilt trip can buy a girl these days............

dr. phil, dr. shmil

2009-02-27T13:07:00.000-08:00

candy doesn't need a PhD.

including these "promises",this bag of candy has delivered a near-octofecta of chocolate coated counseling.

dear allegiant air ticket counter person,

2009-02-25T14:02:00.000-08:00

i am all packed and ready for my ski-adventure-i-hope-i-don't-break-a-limb weekend with hott blair and his family.

i expect that everything is going to go according to plan, but if i miss my flight because i get stuck in airport security due to the fact that i have to pack an entire weekend's worth of clothes (including ski gear) into a carry-on bag, because you seem to think it's perfectly fair to charge me $$$ to check in even ONE bag, bringing my super-saver $29 ticket to an amount MORE THAN DOUBLING the original price, i am prepared to throw a fit that will make this lady look subdued.

just thought you'd appreciate the warning in advance.

see you soon,

rychelle

a picture is worth a thousand thank-yous.

2009-02-23T08:58:00.000-08:00

i found vanessa zinke's blog through a mutual friend of ours.

she posted about her short and sweet courtship with her now husband, and i was hooked.

i continued to stalk her blog to read about her move to and travels around vermont and new england.

i admired her photographs and started commenting on a regular basis.

to my surprise and delight, vanessa contacted me a few weeks ago, looking for a place to stay while she attended a photography convention in las vegas.

i was happy to offer her a room at the hotel tomlin.

she offered her services as a photographer in return.

now, let me just start off by saying I AM NOT PHOTOGENIC.

as evidenced by this picture my "friend" recently posted on facebook. (seriously, what kind of friend would do that?!? i still love ya, sarah!)

i ALWAYS make "a face" when my picture is being taken.

i warned vanessa that she had a gargantuan task ahead of her.

but, she rose to the challenge.

and got some great shots.

i have never loved a photograph of myself. until now.

vanessa, all i can say is YOU ROCK!

you are talented, and beautiful, and generous and i thank you, i thank you, i thank you! (a thousand times).

i think i finally understand the twinkie defense

2009-02-19T08:46:00.000-08:00

"the twinkies made me do it."

i get it now.

because the candies are telling me to do stuff too.

and i listen to them.

my second chocolate covered caramel had this message:

at first i thought it read "think ABOUT limits."

but, clearly i was mistaken.

it wants me to have another. WITHOUT limits.

who am i to argue?

there's a first time for everything

2009-02-17T09:02:00.000-08:00

although our recent BIRTHDAY BASH weekend was not our first trip to california this year or our first time to disneyland, this excursion did include a lot of firsts.

for instance, this was the first time we've had to drive through rain, sleet, snow and hail in order to reach the magic kingdom.

it was also the first time my mom received FREE admission to the park (just for being born. how easy is that?!)

it was the first time mickey decorated just for my mom's birthday (they really are bff).

thanks to the constant rain, this was the first time i didn't have to wait in a line to have my picture taken at this historic landmark (it's also the first time i didn't have 20 strangers in the photo with me).

as soon as it stopped raining, it became the first time i almost froze to death in the park.

which allowed me to mock this postcard for the first time.

and, possibly, the most thrilling new experience included my first CELEBRITY STALKING!

we literally stalked diane keaton half way across the park to get that photo.

and, although i didn't stalk this guy, i'm told he is famous. (all the teeny boppers were going WILD when he got off splash mountain. does anyone recognize him?!?)

with all the less-than-perfect weather aside, we had a truly magical weekend!

happy birthday mom. i love you more than churros!

drawing a winner makes me happy

2009-02-11T18:36:00.000-08:00

i want to thank you all for telling me what makes you happier than a bird with a french fry.

great minds must think alike, because much of what makes you happy, makes me happy too!

once again, i drew you all before drawing THE winner.....

and that lucky winner is:

shellie!!!

(please e-mail me your mailing address)

thanks again for participating everyone.

the mother of all birthdays

2009-02-06T07:49:00.000-08:00

on monday, my darling mother will be celebrating a birthday!

and, since her bff, mickey mouse, invited us to spend the day with him, we are heading towards disneyland tomorrow.

i just wanted to take a minute to wish my mom a magical day and tell her that she truly means the world to me!

i couldn't have asked for a better mother or a better friend.

mom, I LOVE YOU!

happy birthday!

(and, since it's YOUR day, we can ride the train as many times as you want. that's my gift to you. seriously, it's the only thing i got.)

don't worry, be happy

2009-02-04T07:36:00.000-08:00

i started 2008 by announcing it was going to be THE YEAR OF GEORGE (an extended version of george costanza's summer of george).

i guess i figured if i declared, up front, that 2008 was going to be a great year, it actually would be a great year.

and, it started off great.

but, about mid-year, things started to become less than great.

and then things became down right awful.

there were a few months where i wondered if i would ever be happy again, ever feel "normal" again.

thankfully, with the help and support of my super-fantastic friends and family, i was able to (slowly) pull out of my funk.

i learned (once again. sometimes i'm a little slow on the uptake) that i can't always control what happens in my life.

all i can control is my reaction to those things.

"how i deal", if you will.

that's when i discovered this little gem:

print purchased here. frame purchased here.

it has actually served as a reminder that I must make a daily choice to BE HAPPY.

that's not always an easy thing to do.

there are days i forget (like i said, a little slow on the uptake).

but, that's why i have this poster hanging on my office wall.

to serve as a daily reminder.

it's been there since september.

and, because i love it so much, i want to share it with you.

i am going to send an original print (unframed) to one lucky commenter.

please tell me what makes you happier than a bird with a french fry, or how you get through those rough patches in your life.

i will draw a winner one week from today. (everyone who leaves a comment will be entered. one entry per person. good luck!)

p.s.

this print also helped me get through the summer. i may throw it in as a bonus.

heaven

2009-02-02T13:26:00.000-08:00

if heaven does not turn out to be an exact replica of san diego, i am going to be muy disappointed!

where else can you find average temps of 78 degrees in JANUARY???

where else can you eat at THE BEST MEXICAN RESTARAUNT IN THE UNIVERSE three days in a row???

where else can you spend the evenings strolling the beach with your loved ones, in shorts and short sleeves, IN JANUARY???

where else can you chase a giant rolling cupcake two city blocks, to end up at a heavenly bakery??? (is the name a coincidence?!? i think not!)

on a side note, if anyone is currently living in san diego, and looking for a full time house guest (kato kaelin style), look no further. here i am!

thank you, hott blair and ron, for inviting us to join you at this heaven on earth. we had a blast!

california, here i come

2009-01-28T07:46:00.000-08:00

in a few short hours, i will be hitting the road, heading towards san diego.

my mom and i are meeting up with two of my favorite uncles (hott blair, and ron).

i plan on spending the next four days doing this:

unfortunately, it will be sans snuggie.

unless i can manage to find a snuggie supplier on the way there.

of course, after eating at the old town mexican cafe four days in a row (as i plan to do), i may need the snuggie more than ever, as it will be the only thing that will fit around my enchilada stuffed body.

see you all next week!

wii fit to be tied

2009-01-26T08:34:00.000-08:00

"fit to be tied"

i'm not sure where this saying came from, but i know my mom uses it whenever she is upset about something.

right now i am upset about something.

and that something would be a little piece of technology called the wii fit.

yes, i finally took the contraption out of the box.

only to have it insult me, shove my mii into a less than flattering track outfit and a less than flattering shape.

(do these pants make me look fat?)

then, to top it all off, the wii got upset with me after i apparently GAINED 3.1 pounds on my second day of use.

it had the nerve to ask me what i thought i was doing wrong, since i was heading in the opposite direction of my goal to LOOSE weight.

oddly enough, allowing a machine to strip me of all dignity and self esteem was not a given reason.

i can only assume the wii sensed that i was planning to prepare (and possibly eat) these delectable delights for my co-worker's birthday today.

it posted that 3.1 pound weight gain as a preemptive warning.

in that case, wii, i thank you.

i will now only enjoy one cupcake, instead of six.

(i will, of course, still eat six. but, i will only enjoy one).

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MARGIE!

(don't worry, i didn't get you a wii).

i resolve to be less fat

2009-01-22T08:42:00.000-08:00

i don't usually make new year's resolutions.

they never stick.

but, this year i have resolved to be less fat.

really, i have just decided to be more healthy (or healthier for you grammarians).

i even signed up for tiburon's on-line biggest looser competition.

i managed to loose less than one pound in the first week, so i'm thinking i've got this thing in the bag!

i was able to loose some weight in the past with the help of a little website called sparkpeople.com.

sparkpeople.com allows you to track all the food you eat and the exercise you perform each day.

now, i haven't logged onto my account in over six months, but as soon as i can remember my password, i'm sure it will prove a useful aid to me once more.

but, the real secret to my success is going to be this:

yes, i realize it's been sitting in the box since i purchased it three days ago, but i truly feel less fat just owning it.

just like when i truly felt more in shape just by purchasing my gym membership.

anyway, i'm hoping now that i've announced my get-less-fat-plan in a public forum, i might somehow feel ~~shamed into actually following through with it~~ MOTIVATED.

if you have any tips, please feel free to share them.

and, if you're also participating in the biggest looser competition, feel free to leave your address and i will happily send you one of these:

it's low-cal, i swear!

oh, yay, i didn't die!

2009-01-20T11:42:00.000-08:00

first of all, i want to thank you all for your well-wishes.

i have FINALLY recovered from the chuck norris of cold/flu bugs that i contracted during my vacation!

now, even though the holidays are SO over, i want to take a moment to share mine with you.....

it all started out out with a plethora of gifts from my fabulous and funny (and obviously very giving) friend, heidi.

sorry, but that pile-o-gifts deserved a blog shout out!

my mom and i spent christmas eve with my best and oldest friend, martha, and her family.

where we feasted on this

twice baked potato casserole. sorry, but it deserved it's own blog shout out too!

i finished off the festivities with these two ya-hoos. (there's a possibilty i'm actually related to that guy. the test results are still out.)

after all of that, i left (on a jet plane) for slc.

where i spent ten days with my favorite person. (oh, yeah, and his parents and grandparents too.) ;)

our days included endless hours of horseback riding,

enjoying piles and piles of snow,

repairing and riding four-wheelers,

and generally looking cool.

i also got to meet some really ~~delicious scones~~ hilarious bloggers at johanna's kitchen.

(camille, see - you were totally there! i think i forgot to compliment you on your fab purple sweater.)

i want to thank everyone who attended the breakfast.

you were all funny and beautiful women.

my only wish was that we would have had more time to ~~eat delicous scones~~ chat.

oh, and did i mention the scones????

sorry i couldn't resist scarfing down half of it before taking the picture.

i ended my trip, as you know, with the chuck norris of cold/flu bugs and a renewed addiction to this game:

i will be checking out your posts (well, most of your posts. i have over 1,000 in my reader) to see how you've been spending your days. look for me in your comment boxes.

happy (belated) 2009!

you've been mostly-dead all day.

2009-01-07T12:16:00.000-08:00

"there's a big difference between mostly dead and all dead. mostly dead is slightly alive. with all dead, well, with all dead there's usually only one thing you can do."

"what's that?"

"go through his clothes and look for loose change."

so, it turns out people have started rummaging through my clothes looking for loose change.

the day before i left slc, i ended up with the stomach flu, and now i have a sinus infection, the beginning stages of bronchitis, three prescriptions, and a doctor's note releasing me from work, school or play for the rest of the week.

i know christmas is SO ten minutes ago, but as soon as i'm well enough to type for more than ten minutes, i'll post about my trip and holiday vaca.

until then, my singular goal is to remain slightly alive.

tomorrow, tomorrow...it's only a day away...

2008-12-29T15:43:00.000-08:00

i hope you have all enjoyed a safe and merry christmas! (from what i've read on your blogs, it sounds like you have)

i just wanted to remind everyone that tomorrow i will be sitting at johanna's kitchen at 9:30am, hoping and wishing to meet some of my bloggy bffs.

i hope YOU will join me!

if you can't make it, i'll ~~just talk trash about you~~ MISS YOU VERY MUCH!

i can't wait to take stalking to the next level! ;)

have yourself a merry little christmas

2008-12-23T08:35:00.000-08:00

i wanted to wish you all a very merry christmas!

and, since some of you asked, here are a couple recipes from the cookie party i attended...

peanut butter balls

pumpkin chocolate chip cookies

candycane joe joe truffles (where the recipe calls for oreos, substitute candycane joe joes or candycane oreos)

now you can't say i never gave you anything. ;)

i will be on vacation and blogcation for the next two weeks.

for those of you who live in the salt lake valley, i hope to see you at johanna's on december 30th. otherwise, i'll see you all around the blogosphere next year.

coo-kies

2008-12-22T07:41:00.000-08:00

(said in a cookie monster voice)

last weekend, i was invited to a cookie exchange party.

(sarah, abby, martha)
the party was hosted and attended by four of the funniest people i know in real life.

(heidi, me, abby, martha)
we baked, ate and laughed our @$$e$ off!

there were peaunut butter balls, shortbread cookies, oatmeal cranberry cookies, kitchen sink cookies and pumpkin chocolate chip cookies.

my contribution consisted of candycane joe joe truffles and red velvet cookies. (thank you kristina and lorie for the recipes).

and, if laughing really burns 40 calories every 15 minutes, i'm sure i don't need to worry about how many cookies i ended up eating.

because i spent nearly five hours looking just like that.

in case you haven't heard, it snowed in las vegas

2008-12-19T07:40:00.000-08:00

as mentioned in my previous post, i was thrilled when snow started falling in the las vegas valley.

and, monday's snow fall turned out to be just a preview of the BIG SHOW on wednesday.

some areas of the valley got 10 inches of snow.

we actually had a snow day in vegas, and got sent home early from work.

i thought it was the greatest thing to hit las vegas since neil diamond!

until........

last night, when i sat down to watch wednesday's episode of ellen on the dvr.

instead of getting to see ellen give away thousands of dollars in fabulous prizes, i got to watch one more hour of this:

they preempted ellen to tell me that it was snowing in las vegas.

and, that's all they've "reported" on the news for the past 48 hours.

so, if there is anything newsworthy happening in the world right now, please send me a text message.

happy, happy birthday, robyn, dear

2008-12-17T11:55:00.000-08:00

happy days will come to you all year.

if i had one wish, then it would be

a happy, happy birthday to you from me!

robyn is my dear friend and nyc escort extraordinaire! (and when i say escort, i do NOT mean it in the vegas sense)

*thank you tib, for reminding me i had this photo ;)

(robyn, naked cowboy, me. circa 2007)

i'm so glad you're coming home today, robyn! see ya soon.

when, what to my wondering eyes should appear?

2008-12-16T07:32:00.000-08:00

S N O W!

that's right folks, it SNOWED in las vegas yesterday!

i heard rumors of snow while i was at work, but not a single flurry was seen on campus.

but, as i headed to "my side of town", it was like driving into a winter wonderland.

i know this may not sound like a big deal to some of you, but it's been FIVE YEARS since las vegas has seen any measurable amount of snow.

we, las vegans, were very excited. at least three of my neighbors were out taking pictures with me.

two little girls were making snow angels.

i ate nearly a pound of snow. (don't ruin this with your talk of acid rain)

it's finally begining to look a lot like christmas!

santa claus is coming to town

2008-12-15T07:46:00.000-08:00

and, so am i!

i am visiting family in slc this christmas, and wanted to meet up with my bloggy friends while i'm in town.

if you're interested and/or available, please join me for breakfast on tuesday, december 30, 9:30am.

i will be at johanna's kitchen, 9725 s state st., sandy, ut 84070.

i hope at least a few people are able to make it, so i don't end up all alone in a booth intended for a dozen people. (but don't worry, it wouldn't be the first time, or, i imagine, the last)

if you think you'll be able to come, ~~bring gifts~~ let me know in the comments.

fate chooses your relations, you choose your friends

2008-12-12T08:52:00.000-08:00

one of my favorite things about blogging is the opportunity it has given me to "meet" new friends.

earlier this week, jillene presented me with this friendship award.

friendships are very important to me, and i can't thank jillene enough for extending her friendship to me.

i am extremely greatful for ALL my friends (new and old), but i only get to "tag" eight of you, so here it goes.......

"These blogs are exceedingly charming. These kind bloggers aim to find and be friends. They are not interested in self-aggrandizement. Our hope is that when the ribbons of these prizes are cut, even more friendships are propagated. Please give more attention to these writers. Deliver this award to eight bloggers who must choose eight more and include this cleverly-written text into the body of their award."

1. kristina

2. amander

3. jo

4.peewee

5.marie

6.martha

7.erin

8.brittany

"Friendship is the only cement that will ever hold the world together"- Woodrow Wilson

wrangler butts drive me nuts

2008-12-11T07:44:00.001-08:00

it's that time of year when the cowboys take over the unlv campus.

traffic clogs up as they meander through the streets in their giant diesel trucks.

a distinct aroma fills the air.

a nice layer of dust settles on every surface of our cars and offices.

parking on campus turns into a nightmare.

but, we put up with all the inconveniences because of........... the view.

in addition to the views above, i was pleasantly surprised to see how many cowboys were tough enough to wear pink, in honor of breast cancer awareness.

and, although i may not be a rodeo FANATIC, i certainly had more fun than the guy who sat next to me.

so, thank you NFR. for the views, for supporting a great cause, and for giving my family an excuse to vist.

go ahead punk, make my day

2008-12-09T07:20:00.000-08:00

so, i had to go to sam's club the other day to purchase some candy for the office.

while i was there, i decided to pick up a few personal items.

it wasn't until the checkout clerk SNICKERED OUT LOUD (then hid under the check stand and refused to finish my sale) that i realized just exactly what i was buying.

i guess i won't have to add that particular clerk to my pmsbuddy.com alert list.

he already knows.

saw it, loved it, sharing it with you....

2008-12-08T06:00:00.000-08:00

vanessa, vanessa, bo-bessa, banana-fana fo fessa, fee-fi-mo-messa, vanessa

2008-12-05T07:34:00.000-08:00

i have been singing praises to vanessa all night!

you see, vanessa really rocked my world yesterday.

not only did she give me this awesome award.

she also sent me this amazing ornament.

all the way from new york city. (said with a pace-salsa-commercial-accent)

and, not only did she give me that awesome award and an amazing ornament, she also HAND MADE these cards.

JUST FOR ME.

wow, is she a superstar, or what?!? (answer: she IS a superstar)

thank you vanessa!

and thank you tiburon, for organizing such a fun ornament swap. i'm so glad i participated!

now, for my acceptance speech, i will list five things i love.

1. christmas ornaments from nyc.

2. nyc.

3. handmade cards.

4. handmande anything.

5. vanessa.

i am now passing my award onto

1. camille. i'm so glad the blog kicked your a$$.

2. shelly. meow.

3. tiburon. now you won't have to kill for it.

4. megan. thank you for not forgetting your blog password.

5. barbaloot. and, i'm not just doing this so i can get that pillow case.

hott or nott

2008-12-04T07:10:00.000-08:00

i introduced you all to my favorite uncle, hott blair, a couple months ago.

the response was overwhelming, that he is indeed H.O.T.T hott.

however, when i featured him in my christmas post a few days ago, he went widely unrecognized.

my theory is that his hottness was hiding under a thin layer of geek during the early years of his life.

let us examine .......

back row - my mom, uncle curt, aunt sherrie. front row - hott blair. circa 1974

hott blair and me. circa 1977

hott blair - circa 1977

hott blair - circa 2nd grade

hott blair - circa 1978

hott blair and grandma taylor - circa 1978

hott blair and grandpa taylor - circa 1978

hott blair, dallas and kip - circa 1980

hott blair, sweetie cody, my dad, me and grandpa taylor - circa 1984

my mom, me, hott blair, dallas, kip, tony and sweetie cody - circa 1986

hott blair - circa freshman year of hs

you know what? slightly geeky glasses aside (let's face it, blair, they weren't doing you any favors) i think he has always been a hottie!

i can also see a lot of brant and dawson in these pics.

i love you lots, hott blair!!!

(don't hate me. and let me just state how thankful i am that i've never taken an 'awkward' picture, so there is simply no way you could retaliate).

i want a hippopotamus for christmas

2008-12-03T07:14:00.000-08:00

as i mentioned yesterday, this is my favorite christmas song of all time.

i urge you to listen to it REPEATEDLY.

memorize the lyrics.

and refer back to it whenever you get a little bogged down or start to feel overwhelmed this holiday season.

you CAN NOT be in a bad mood when you hear or sing this song.

i swear, it's simply impossible.

don't believe me?

even hallmark knows it's true.

that's why they released this ornament.

just for me.

and just for you.

also, i want to give a special shout out to karen, who has had to endure and support my hippopotamus obsession for almost ten years! love ya', karen!

it's beginning to look a lot like christmas

2008-12-02T07:45:00.000-08:00

although, it feels NOTHING like christmas.

71 degrees? hello, nevada, are you freakin kidding me?!?

despite the fact i'm wearing crop pants and a t-shirt, christmas is only 23 days away, so i decided to do this tag from hott blair's blog. (hott blair is even featured in a photo below).

Wrapping paper or gift bags? i start out with paper, and resort to bags the closer it gets to christmas.

Real or Artificial tree? REAL. ALWAYS. thank you grandpa taylor!

When do you put up the tree? as soon as it arrives from grandpa taylor’s farm. usually, the first week of the NFR.

When do you take the tree down? after it starts to die. i think we still had a tree up in march once.

Do you like Eggnog? if by like you mean LOVE, then yes.

Favorite gift received as a child? skates.

Hardest person to buy for? my dad.

Easiest person to buy for? my mom.

Do you have a nativity scene? many.

Mail or email Christmas cards? mail. and, yes, we usually send a cheesy letter too.

Worst Christmas gift you ever received? i’m pretty sure that would be a pack of undies, that i had to open in front of all my boy cousins.

Favorite Christmas Movie? a christmas story! nothing says christmas like a pink bunny suit.

When do you start shopping for Christmas? i shop and craft all year long.

Have you ever recycled a Christmas present? i plead the fifth.

Favorite thing to eat at Christmas? my mom’s homemade caramels.

Lights on the tree? red and green only.

Favorite Christmas song? i want a hippopotamus for christmas.

Travel at Christmas or stay home? travel, if i can.

Can you name all of Santa's reindeer's? dasher and dancer and prancer and vixen. comet and cupid and donner and blitzen. and rudolph, of course.

Angel on the tree top or a star? angel.

Open the presents Christmas Eve or morning? one on christmas eve (usually a pair of jammies), the rest on christmas morning.

Most annoying thing about this time of the year? it’s over too soon.

Favorite ornament theme or color? our tree is filled with handmade/homemade ornaments. i love them all, but especially the thumb print mouse i made as a child.

Favorite for Christmas dinner? we re-create thanksgiving with all the trimmings. yum!

What do you want for Christmas this year? iTunes gift cards. oh, and a boyfriend, wrapped in a bow (holding an iTunes gift card). oh, and world peace, of course.

I feel a very unusual sensation - if it is not indigestion, I think it must be gratitude. ~ Benjamin Disraeli

2008-12-01T09:57:00.000-08:00

i was fortunate enough to spend the holiday weekend with some of my favorite people (including my most favorite person).

here is a TOP TEN list of the things i was most thankful for this past weekend. (in no particular order) (and, unfortunately, not letterman funny. i think i should hire his writers...)

1. the most comfortable bed i've ever slept in while on vacation.
2. good eats.

3. game night(s). phase ten, scattergories, taboo.....i love you all.
4. friends. new and old.
5. family

6. harmons
7. wood burning fireplaces
8. sweater weather
9. $49 plane tickets
10. craft time

i hope you all had lots to be thankful for as well.

and, happy cyber monday!

happy thanksgiving back*

2008-11-25T11:08:00.000-08:00

* bonus points for identifying that movie line.

i just wanted to wish everyone happy packing, happy traveling, happy stuffing your face, happy plane rides, happy family day, happy shopping, happy loosening your pants, happy leftovers, happy game playing, happy standing in lines, happy pajama days, happy road trips, happy bobby sandwiches, happy movie-going, happy naps, happy friends, happy acknowledging all you are grateful for, HAPPY THANKSGIVING!

4x4

2008-11-24T07:22:00.000-08:00

my fabulous bloggy friend from england presented me with this amazing award.

but, since i already did the tag associated with this award about a month ago, i am graciously accepting this award by posting the fourth picture from the fourth folder of my picture library.

description: my favorite uncle, hott blair, and i enjoying lunch at brio tuscan grille.
date: october, 2008

our futures are so bright, we've gotta wear shades

and since he is so hott, i pass this ~~tag~~ award on to hott blair.

say hello to my little friend

2008-11-21T07:37:00.000-08:00

now, if someone could show me how to use it, that would be awesome!

(no, seriously.)

i'm good enough, i'm smart enough, and gosh darn it, people like me

2008-11-19T20:21:00.000-08:00

wow.

i am flattered and stunned that so many of you expressed a desire to meet little ol' me. but, mostly stunned. and mostly flattered.

unfortunately, since my time in slc is short next week, i won't be able to have a get-together.

i was able to score an invitation to lunch with my fabulous bloggy friend from england (an international meet-n-greet. it's so james bond, isn't it?!?), but the rest of my time will be spent hangin' with my rock star family.

whereas hangin' equals stuffing my face with turkey, kickin' butt at phase ten, and shopping at harmons.

i usually make it up to slc every couple of months or so. (my fave person is growing like a weed, and i hate to miss it), so i hope you all will still be interested in meeting me for lunch when i make it back to town!

for those of you attending this weekend's meet-n-greet, i hope you ~~miss me~~ have an amazing time, as i know you will. (i tried to skype my way into the last one, but no one took me up on my offer).

dear utah,

2008-11-19T07:26:00.000-08:00

i'm excited to see you next week!

i just wanted to make sure you got the memo that IT IS NOW FALL.

because, apparently your cousin, nevada, did not receive the notice.

it is freakin' 86 degrees here. (i had to use the air conditioner in my car yesterday. sheesh.)

i am packing a ton of sweaters for my trip, and i HOPE TO WEAR THEM without having a heat stroke.

also, i expect to see a lot of this during my trip.

*imaged changed from brightly colored trees to snowy mountains.

please don't let me down.

your frequent visitor and long time fan,
rychelle

can't buy me love

2008-11-18T07:26:00.000-08:00

thanks to kristina's fool-proof on-line dating advice, i can cancel my order for this.

i think i'll use the $44.95 i saved on the pillow to get glamour shots done for my on-line profile.

*p.s. - if it ever comes to the point where i really order the boyfriend pillow, please just shoot me. a copy of this post will get you off at trial.

isn't it ironic

2008-11-17T07:31:00.000-08:00

when you get in a car accident while you're the designated driver?

*we were rear-ended by a taxi driver. oh look, just one more reason for me to hate taxi drivers!

when an artist does THREE encores while your bladder is so full it might explode, and you're stuck in the center of the aisle, with no hope of escape?

*alanis morissette rockin' the joint.

christina and kelly, i had a great time! even though it started out with a bang and nearly ended with an "accident". ;)

if you didn't wish you worked with me before, you will now

2008-11-14T07:20:00.000-08:00

when i received my bag of ransom burritos, i seriously considered eating them all myself.

let's face it, i had worked hard for those burritos.

but, since i believe in ~~bribing people to remain friends with me~~ i'm nice, i decided to share my burritos with two of my co-workers.

and it was all worth it, since i received this awesome thank you card in return.

and, yes, drawings hold a special place in my heart.

it's the most wonderful time of the year

2008-11-13T07:20:00.000-08:00

because these tasty treats are finally on the shelves again........

trader joe's candy cane joe-joe's.

delish!

tacos, tacos, tacos

2008-11-12T07:38:00.000-08:00

my love for tacos has been mentioned a couple times on this blog. (here, here and here)

and, just so you know this is not just a lustful, new-formed crush, i present you with a story i wrote back in the first grade.

so, as you can see, my love for tacos is long-standing.

and, my artistic abilities have remained the same.

my love for tacos is, however, very specific.

i'm NOT in love with taco bell's $.69 version of a taco.

i AM in love my mother's homemade tacos.

she has a secret ingredient.

and that secret ingredient is fried taco shells.

fill one of these bad boys with some taco meat (seasoned by mccormick), lettuce, cheese, onions and a dollop of sour cream, and you could convince me to do just about anything in exchange for it's goodness.

i did not realize until quite late in life that not everyone's mother prepared tacos this way. (poor you!)

but, lest you think my affinity for all things taco dies with my mom's tacos, i would like to point out that i also enjoy lisa's six dollar tacos, walt's taco salad, margie's taco pie and my very own taco soup.

mmmmmmm.....suddenly, i'm very hungry.

*ps - the burrito ransom has been paid. sorry for those of you who had your eyes on that groovy toaster. and, yes, they were delicious!

baby daddy

2008-11-10T07:18:00.000-08:00

i've always known that i wanted to be a mother.

and now that i know that i will make beautiful babies, i'm anxious to get started!

* inpired by kristina and made possible by volkswagen.

mostly, i'm just anxious to get started. (wink, wink)

i drew a winner

2008-11-07T07:45:00.000-08:00

in fact i drew 30 winners.

but, since i only have one mini zip pouch to give away, i used these drawings to draw THE winner.

and that winner is

camille!

now you can fufill your mother's dying wish and prove that i am not just a "pretend" friend.

it's a win-win situation!!

e-mail me your address (using the button in my sidebar) and i'll start stalking you at your home.

i mean, i'll get your prize shipped out right away.

congratulations, camille!

and, thank you ALL for playing.

my sam's club gift guide arrived just in the nick of time

2008-11-06T12:34:00.000-08:00

i will be sitting at my laptop, with my fingers at the ready, at exactly 10:00pm cst tomorrow night.

and, since stephenie meyer owes me at least $9,500 for making it all the way through book four, i've got this covered!

which three of you would like to be my guests?!?

just when you thought the elections were over

2008-11-06T07:26:00.000-08:00

my favorite person is in the race for emperor of the free world.

er, um, i mean he is trying to become 97.1's next jack-o-cutie.

and, he would appreciate your support.

he's running on a platform of laughter...

dancing...

and equal rights for all toddlers dressed as mice.

if you support these issues, please go here and vote for contestant #214.

this may be the most important ballot you ever cast.

stalkers rock

2008-11-05T09:18:00.000-08:00

i'm not celebrating my 20,000th blog visit or my 100,000th comment.

i just like to buy stuff and give it to people i may or may not know in real life.

and when i saw this super adorable mini zip pouch, i thought of YOU.

and just had to get it for you!

i've purchased several things from the fried okra etsy shop.

and they are all lovely.

but this one is just for you.

*if you think the 'you' mentioned above should be YOU, leave a comment on THIS POST telling me why YOU ROCK.

i will draw a winner on friday, november 7th.

will work for burritos

2008-11-04T07:40:00.000-08:00

my brother's girlfriend, lisa, is a fantastic cook.

she makes a six dollar taco that ALMOST makes me want to drop cody down a notch on my "things i love most in this world" list.

and she can throw together a burrito that only slightly pales in comparison to the six dollar taco (and to cody).

when lisa goes out of town, she stocks the fridge full of homemade burritos so she doesn't have to come home and find cody emaciated. (because without her, some guys would starve. whereas some guys = cody)

as the official dog sitter at the breeze/gretta/disco residence, i have requested payment for my services in the form of a fridge full of burritos.

however, my requests (er, demands) have yet to be taken seriously.

i guess they feel it could take a while before my body could actually be considered emaciated.

and while that is probably true, i feel that a fridge full of burritos is a small price to pay for my outstanding services. (i have yet to loose a dog)

so, i've decided to take this matter to the next level.

and by the next level, i mean the involvement of threats, ransom notes and hostages.

so, cody and lisa, i say GAME ON!

p.s.
i would like to thank heidi for initiating and helping me to implement this ploy.
you are an evil genius! and that's why we will always be friends.

this weekend i got arrested

2008-11-03T12:45:00.000-08:00

it goes without saying, that i've never been one of the cool kids.

i'm just not hip enough.

i don't catch onto trends until after they're way past trendy.

(ie. i just started wearing leggings and hyper-color t-shirts)

i believe it is because of my inability to sense what the cool kids are doing that i missed out on a little television gem i like to call arrested development. (well, i'm not the only one who likes to call it that. apparently, everyone likes to call it that, because that's the name of the show.)

if you're looking for a way to spend a weekend with a family even more dysfunctional and hilarious than your own, add this show to your netflix queue.

you will thank me later (preferably with large, shiny gifts).

p.s.

i know i will cause 99% of you to spontaneously combust by admitting this, but i'm saying it anyway. (standing aside with a fire extinguisher at the ready)

i just don't "get" the office.

i received the first three seasons on netflix, but never made it past episode three of season two.

see, i'm just not cool.

doing the right thing deserves a cookie

2008-10-30T07:31:00.000-07:00

i went to the mall last night.

to stimulate the economy (does that phrase sound dirty to anyone else? no? just me? well, let's pretend i never asked then).

and to vote (because celebrities told me to).

right after casting my ballot for stewart/colbert, i saw these little gems.

because nothing says "it's better to have loved and lost, than to be stuck with that looser the rest of my life" than a giant cookie.

and these two creations, brought to you by the letter "O".

happy h"O"lloween everybody!

i'm sending it to five people i don't like

2008-10-29T14:11:00.000-07:00

so, if you get it in an e-mail... sorry.

no comment

2008-10-28T07:55:00.000-07:00

question - your baby brother just turned 30. does that make you feel old?

happy birthday sweetie cody! i love you more than tacos.

party like a rock star (or a mouse, or a witch, or a rag doll)

2008-10-27T12:39:00.000-07:00

i had the best date this weekend.

my suitor invited me to a halloween party.

he insisted that we go in "matching costumes".

you know, so everyone would realize we were "together". so they would realize we were a "couple".

he insisted that we pose for pictures, just like you do on prom night.

he was a total flirt, but a perfect gentleman.

it might have something to do with the fact that his whole family came along as chaperons.

(but i still let him get to first base ;) he gives the best raspberry kisses)

*swoon*

support the cause

2008-10-24T07:23:00.000-07:00

*purchase shirt at this fab etsy shop.

i think i will buy this shirt for my new boyfriend, captain jack sparrow, in honor of breast cancer awareness month.

i need a vacation to recover from my vacation

2008-10-23T07:29:00.001-07:00

*image taken AFTER i read over 100 posts last night.

can... not... post... must... clear... up... my... google... reader...

holy typing batman, people had a lot to say in two days.

disney days

2008-10-22T09:04:00.000-07:00

it's true what they say - disneyland is the happiest place on earth!

i've decided i'm going to marry one of these guys, so i can live there year-round.

and our wedding will be in the fall, because that's when they have the best decorations.

*sign reads: candy corn cactus - plant in full sun with dry sense of humor.

thanks again jay!

and, if you're not fortunate enough to have an uncle jay who provides you with free tickets to disneyland (poor you), don't fret.

instead, head over to the disneyland website and sign up to receive free admission on your birthday in 2009.

M I C K E Y M O U S E

2008-10-19T16:31:00.000-07:00

M I C see ya on wednesday. K E Y why? because i'm on my way to disneyland.

M O U S E.

my favorite uncle, jay, scored me free tickets to disneyland! woo-hoo (sorry hott blair, but the contest for my favorite uncle just got interesting. i think you know what to do.....ireland!)

sweeeeet!

2008-10-16T13:49:00.000-07:00

tomorrow, october 18, is national chocolate cupcake day!

the one with the moist maker sandwich

2008-10-16T07:34:00.000-07:00

*kristina, i'm sorry for posting another video. but, if you do not know all the episodes of friend's by heart, then you clearly have bigger issues than not having a set of speakers on your work computer.

has this ever happened to you?

has anyone ever stolen your sandwich?

your sandwich WITH THE MOIST MAKER?

i know it's happened to me!

although my sandwich was a dr. pepper (with a moist maker).

but, i was just as crazy angry as ross.

i mean, c'mon thievies YOU KNOW YOU DID NOT BRING THAT SANDWICH (OR DR. PEPPER) TO WORK.

well, if this has ever happened to you, and you don't want to resort to writing a phoebe-style note to protect your sandwich with the moist maker, this is the answer to your prayers:

this is the anti-theft lunch bag.

now, why didn't i think of that?

the lesser of two evils

2008-10-15T07:35:00.000-07:00

delight.com is offering this super confused election set to help you pick a candidate, if you "literally can't take it anymore".

p.s.

i was going to title this post giant douche v. turd sandwich , but i didn't want to offend any readers. (well.....until now)

it's snowing

2008-10-13T22:02:00.000-07:00

those are two words you DO NOT want to hear when you're camping!

i've never understood people who went "camping" in their luxury rv.

they hook up to dish tv, microwave their dinner, and park their bottoms in a lazy-boy while ignoring the great outdoors.

but, now i get it.

those things have heaters!

mary & dom - thank you for allowing me to park my bottom in your lazy boy (right next to the heater). it gave me something to dream about when i returned to my teardrop and slept under seven quilts.

and the oscar goes to...

2008-10-09T21:55:00.000-07:00

well, i didn't win an oscar, but i did win a .......

brillante weblog premio-2008 "award".

they're practically the same thing, right?

i would like to thank all the same people kristina eloquently thanked in her acceptance speech.

including the little people (from the big world).

but, most of all, i would like to thank wendy for awarding me with this....well, award.

(as a condition of this award, i must now spill my guts. and by spill my guts, i mean answer each question in one word or less. whereas less = no response.)

1. Where is your cell phone? purse
2. Where is your significant other? missing
3. Your hair color? natural
4. Your mother? hilarious
5. Your father? mailman
6. Your favorite thing? hope
7. Your dream last night? forgotten
8. Your dream/goal? domination (world)
9. The room you're in? boudoir
10. Your hobby? travel
11. Your fear? clowns
12. Where do you want to be in 6 years? home
13. Where were you last night? bed
14. What you're not? hairless
15. One of your wish-list items? fraggles
16. Where you grew up? army
17. The last thing you did? type
18. What are you wearing? jammies
19. Your TV? off
20. Your pet(s)? missed
21. Your computer? lappy
22. Your mood? rebellious
23. Missing someone? favorite
24. Your car? fixed!
25. Something you're not wearing? under-roos
26. Favorite store? fabric
27. Your summer? over?
28. Love someone? always
29. Your favorite color? periwinkle
30. When is the last time you laughed? blog-stalking
31. Last time you cried? embarrassing

you know what?

now that i've answered all these questions, i'm pretty sure this award is just some ploy to get the answers to the questions guarding my super-secret-internet-passwords.......hhhhhmmmmm.

*forget you read this post*

warning tmi ahead

2008-10-09T13:07:00.001-07:00

(tmi - too much information)

(uti - urinary tract infection)

you have been warned!

i've been neglecting my little bloggy because i've decided it would be way more fun to get a uti instead.

and by fun i mean awesome.

and by awesome i mean a totally crappy idea.

all i can say is - what's next?!? locusts?

i'm wearing my red socks

2008-10-07T07:26:00.000-07:00

BOSTON -- If you're big into baseball, you've no doubt got a mental catalog of October ninth innings through which you instantly scroll when something like this magical Monday night at Fenway Park unfolds. (*full article found here)

well, i'm not big into baseball.

in fact, i don't really understand the fundamentals of most sports.

but, apparently last night was a MAGICAL night for the boston red soxs.

and, since my friend, jenn, is a member of the red sox nation, i'm giving the red sox a shout out on todays blog.

go sox!

p.s.

i may not know much about baseball, but i do know much about jimmy fallon. and, he loved the red sox in that movie fever pitch. (although, he is apparently a yankees fan in real life)

p.p.s.

i'm not really wearing red socks. i'm wearing sandals. (sans socks)

happy fall, ya'll

2008-10-06T08:34:00.000-07:00

it's finally starting to feel like fall in las vegas.

meaning, we finally had an official high of less than 80 degrees. (78 degrees yesterday)

*image courtesy of google images

I would send you a bouquet of newly sharpened pencils if I knew your name and address.
*quote courtesy of one of my fave movies - you've got mail

like herpes....but, for positive

2008-10-04T01:45:00.000-07:00

now that you've done the right thing and registered to vote, visit jay's blog and register to win fabulous prizes!